A Chinese-American bride says yes to a lucky red dress

My wedding plans didn’t begin with a red dress. The idea was to bring the wedding to my dad in his assisted-living facility – a nice one housed in a former hotel in suburban New York, complete with a cinema and a fancy swimming pool.

My fiancé and I also made arrangements with the pastor, the DJ and the photographer, as well as a short and sweet guest list, while artificial intelligence (AI) helped us come up with a special cocktail for the occasion. With 60 days to go before the wedding, I thought we were in good shape.

“What about the dress?” a good friend asked. What about it, indeed? I had bought not one but two white wedding dresses post-engagement. I’d been through the ritual of being fitted by both a boutique and a national bridal retail chain. I had photographic proof of myself ringing a bell and posing with a “I said yes to the dress!” sign.

In Western tradition, white wedding dresses symbolise purity, while the gown has become the centrepiece of the event. Not only have romantic comedies such as 27 Dresses spotlighted the wedding gown, the search for it has also inspired reality television series like Say Yes to the Dress.

But because I meant to pay tribute to my father on the big day, it slowly sparked a desire to incorporate our culture. The Chinese dress known as cheongsam or qipao surfaced from memory. I’d attended wedding banquets myself where the garment was a must-have. I dug up lovely photos of my aunt’s wedding in 1960s Hong Kong, showcasing the qipao she and her guests wore – as personalised as a fingerprint, not a single inch of extra fabric.

The figure-hugging dress has long evolved from the loose Qing-dynasty robe, and red is traditionally worn for good fortune. As I did more homework, I learned that modern Chinese couples’ preferences have changed: brides increasingly prefer the white dress, or make sure they have two – one white, one red – for dual photo shoots and ceremonies.