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Chinese culture
LifestyleFamily & Relationships

How to greet your Chinese relatives in Cantonese – do you know your gu fu from your yi ma?

Chinese family titles can be a minefield. From paternal grandfathers’ older brothers to mothers’ younger sisters, here are some useful ones

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Do you know how to properly address your Chinese relatives? We examine just a few of the ones you hear often in Hong Kong. Illustration: Brian Wang
Nancy Wang

One of the most basic but important parts of Chinese etiquette is knowing how to greet your older relatives correctly.

Ancient Chinese society placed a strong emphasis on hierarchy and respecting seniors, something that continues to be observed in contemporary Chinese culture.

The practice of a verbal greeting, often combined with a hand gesture, can be traced back to a collection of ancient Confucian texts – Zhouli (The Rites of Zhou), Yili (The Book of Etiquette and Ceremonial) and Liji (The Book of Rites) – that depict Chinese ceremonies and etiquette.

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Unlike in many countries, where calling your uncles and aunties by their name is common, the Chinese have a more elaborate kinship system that assigns a specific term to every family member based on their relative age, gender and generation.

For example, when greeting your father’s older sister’s husband in Cantonese, you would call him gu cheung, whereas your mother’s older sister’s husband would be called yi cheung. Both are your uncles by marriage, but they do not have the same term.

Chinese people have a kinship system that assigns a specific term to every family member based on their relative age, gender and generation. Photo: Shutterstock
Chinese people have a kinship system that assigns a specific term to every family member based on their relative age, gender and generation. Photo: Shutterstock

There are also very strict distinctions between blood relatives and relatives formed by marriage, as well as between paternal relatives and maternal relatives, according to “A Comparative Study of Chinese and Western Greetings from the Perspective of Politeness Principle”, published in the journal IRA Academico Research.

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