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Luisa Tam

The recent announcement of actor Hugh Jackman’s split from his wife of 27 years has sent shock waves through the entertainment industry and beyond.
The news has left many wondering what went wrong and questioning the very foundation of love and long-term commitment.
Celebrity separations often attract intense media scrutiny and speculation. While it is natural for people to be curious about the reasons behind a high-profile split, it is crucial to respect the privacy of those involved.
It is important to remember that even the most seemingly perfect of relationships can face challenges.

Jackman’s Hollywood movie star status, and his and his wife Deborra-Lee Furness’ demanding careers, undoubtedly added pressure to their marriage.
Balancing personal and professional lives can be a delicate juggling act and, in some cases, it can lead to strain on a relationship.
In a long-term relationship, individuals grow and change and personal goals, ambitions and priorities can shift, sometimes leading partners in different directions.
For many couples, it could mean a natural evolution, resulting in a gradual disconnect that ultimately leads to separation. It is important to recognise that personal growth and self-discovery are integral parts of any individual’s journey.
Before exploring the many factors that contribute to the success of a long-term partnership, Valentina Tudose, a relationship expert and certified hypnotherapist, says: “First and foremost, trust is essential, as it forms the foundation of a strong and lasting connection.
Young people in China rail against expert who thinks single life is ‘imperfect’
“At the same time, effective communication allows partners to understand each other’s needs, resolve conflicts, and maintain emotional intimacy.”
We also need to remember support, both practical and emotional, as it helps couples navigate challenges, while conflict resolution skills enable healthier interactions and prevent unresolved issues from festering, she adds.
“Another aspect that needs attention is putting effort into maintaining desire, passion and sexual intimacy to keep the spark alive.”

Tudose warns that even the most solid relationships are not immune to external challenges.
“These external factors like divergent career demands, financial stress, or family dynamics can impact a relationship. Internal factors such as lack of communication, unaddressed conflicts, a loss of emotional connection or partners evolving in different directions, can also strain even the strongest unions.”
She says that it is crucial for partners to recognise and address these challenges as they arise, such as by having regular check-ins, ongoing communication, and seeking professional help if needed. Prioritising quality time together can help navigate hurdles and ensure the longevity of the relationship.

Fortunately, there are warning signs that can help you be on the lookout before it is too late, such as subtle changes in the relationship dynamics.
“This requires attentiveness and commitment to the relationship. Some of the potential signs include a significant decrease in communication, emotional withdrawal, frequent arguments without resolution, lack of trust or transparency, and a decline in shared interests or activities,” Tudose points out.
“Partners need to pay attention to these changes and regularly discuss energy shifts by expressing their concerns and looking for win-win solutions.”
“Working with a relationship coach on a regular basis can provide a safe space to address these warning signs and work towards resolving underlying issues as they show up. It’s like giving your relationship a health check-up,” she adds.

Addressing the concern about whether two successful individuals with highly demanding careers can make it last, Tudose offers this advice.
“Personal success can negatively impact the relationship by pulling the attention and energy from each other. It takes dedication and commitment to regulate this flow between partners and make sure their paths are not leading away from each other.
“Prioritising communication and finding a balance between work and personal life are the fundamental choices partners need to make to keep things going smoothly … scheduling quality time together, utilising effective time management strategies, and being understanding and flexible can help maintain a strong and lasting connection.”

Tudose points out that while every relationship is unique, there are lessons to learn from high-profile break-ups.
“One key lesson is the importance of adaptation and growth as individuals and as a couple. Relationships evolve over time, and partners must be willing to grow together and accommodate each other’s changing needs and aspirations.
“Another lesson is a reminder that open and honest communication is the only way to keep things going well. Addressing concerns, seeking professional help when needed, and being transparent about one’s emotions can prevent issues from festering,” Tudose says.

Finally, she says it is vital to maintain a sense of mutual respect, support and shared values, all of which can help sustain a long-lasting relationship amid the challenges that life may bring.
Luisa Tam is a Post editor who also hosts video tutorials on Cantonese language that are now part of Cathay Pacific’s in-flight entertainment programme


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Sex and relationships

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Hugh Jackman and Deborra-Lee Furness at the 2023 Met Gala in New Yorrk. Photo: TNS

A relationship expert explains the many factors that contribute to the success of a long-term partnership and what must be done to avoid it ending, following news of the end of actor Hugh Jackman’s 27-year-marriage to wife Deborra-Lee Furness. Illustration: Victor Sanjinez

Hugh Jackman and Deborra-Lee Furness at the 2023 Met Gala in New York in May 2023. Photo: TNS

Valentina Tudose is a relationship expert and certified hypnotherapist.

Illustration: Victor Sanjinez

It is vital to maintain a sense of mutual respect, support and shared values, all of which can help sustain a long-lasting relationship. Photo: Shutterstock

Even the most solid relationships are not immune to external challenges. Photo: Shutterstock

Support, both practical and emotional, helps couples navigate challenges, while conflict resolution skills enable healthier interactions and prevent unresolved issues from festering. Photo: Shutterstock

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Davison and Ariana Grande at the 2018 MTV Video Music Awards in New York on August 20, 2018. Photo: Getty Images

Illustration: SCMP/Perry Tse

Relationship expert and certified hypnotherapist Valentina Tudose. Photo: Courtesy of Valentina Tudose

Davidson with Phoebe Dynevor at the Wimbledon Tennis Championships in London, England, on July 3, 2021. Photo: Getty Images

Davidson dated Kate Beckinsale in 2019. Photo: Reuters

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The Temple Street Night Market in Jordan, Hong Kong, in 2017. The recent “Night Vibes Hong Kong” campaign aims to revitalise nightlife in  the city. Photo: Shutterstock

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Kardashian and West at the 2021 Vanity Fair party. Rejection is one of the most difficult feelings to deal with, and the build-up of resentment can cause a person to act out in numerous ways. Photo: Instagram/@kimkardashian

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Nathalie Sommer is a relationship and intimacy coach.

Maintain open communication with your partner and pick a suitable time to talk. Photo: Shutterstock

Illustration by Perry Tse

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Lifestyle

Family & Relationships

Opinion

While the news of actor Hugh Jackman’s separation may be disheartening, it is crucial to remember that many successful long-term relationships exist
Instead of losing faith, we should focus on the potential for growth within relationships: it involves cultivating communication, trust and support, says expert


With Hugh Jackman’s marriage to his wife of 27 years ending, a relationship expert explains the factors that contribute to the success of a long-term partnership.


Fame and celebrity

5050

Expresses the views, ideas and conclusions of the author. (Eg. Enough of Crazy Rich Asians, think of crazy poor Hongkongers.)


Column

The Naked Truth