The Naked Truth | Sexual desire comes in two flavours: find yours and your partner’s, and follow our expert tips to balance your sex life
- Sexual desire can be spontaneous or responsive, and each involves different forms of attraction
- Whether you are instantly turned on or need to warm up, the secret is to maintain balance
We all express desire differently, and sexual intimacy is not always like it is in films and television, where both partners are turned on instantaneously and get down to business any time and anywhere they want.
There is nothing wrong if you are the type who needs time to warm up to sex, or if you and your partner have varying sex drives.
Some people need to be in the mood for sex, and to get to that stage they need to be stimulated in whatever ways fire them up. Others can be turned on and get excited out of nowhere or without any stimulation, whether sexual or non-sexual.
There are two kinds of sexual desire – spontaneous and responsive – and both are totally normal. What’s abnormal is to expect anyone to sustain a heightened sex drive, with that level of passion and spontaneity, all the time.
Before talking about what to do if you and your partner are polar opposites in the sexual desire department, it’s worth taking time to examine the difference between spontaneous and responsive sexual desires.
