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Charlotte Parsons

It's a sad day for Lai See - a day replete with advance-nostalgia.

Today  is this columnist's last day working at the South China Morning Post. Come Monday, David Evans will be writing this column.

So naturally we've been wandering down memory lane, emitting gusty sighs and re-reading the SCMP interviews of yesteryear.

There was one in particular that caught our attention. It was headlined 'Graduates Led Astray' and starred . .  - Richard Li.

The article was dated March 9, 1999 - back before he took over the phone company.

Here's what it said: 'The lure of making a quick buck had turned graduates away from their professions, Richard Li warned.'

Then came this quote: 'The graduates on the engineering side are . . . good, technically, but they are not very creative.'

The article concluded by informing readers that 'Mr Li, a computer engineering graduate, said he had asked students their goals after graduation and some wanted to be telephone salesmen'.

'He felt sad on hearing this because other salespeople could be found who did not hold degrees but who could prove more effective than the graduates.'

A year later, and Mr Li, without a degree, found himself buying HKT . . . and selling telephones.

Hard-luck story:  Ever wonder what high-profile Hong Kong Government land agents get up to in their time off?

Nor do we. But reader Howard McKay insisted on telling us about it.

He told us just such an agent recently joined his mates for a friendly golf competition in Laoag. A city in the northern Philippines. Apparently PAL now flies there direct.

Anyway, the first morning found our land agent hero coming down for the hotel breakfast buffet. He went to the pastry section and selected a small baguette.

As one does, he squeezed it. It was rock hard.

Incensed, he called over the waiter and banged the hard object theatrically on the table in a manner akin to closing one of his land auctions.

'Today is Saturday,' he declared angrily. 'This is Monday's bread.'

The waiter was deferential.

'Sir,' he replied. 'You've taken the bread from the display basket.'

Ghost writers: By now, you've probably read about the ghost of the SCMP.

No doubt you fear for Lai See 's supernatural safety.

Well fret no more - a Buddhist exorcist was brought in and the phantom of the women's toilets is now at peace.

But that hasn't stopped the spirited Top Five.com gang from writing about us.

They heard about our little supernatural infestation and they couldn't resist cobbling together one of their lists on the subject.

Lai See  proudly presents these excerpts from the SCMP-inspired 'Top Signs Your Office Is Haunted':

You find yourself suddenly covered in slime, and there's nobody from marketing anywhere nearby.

You hear the blood-curdling groans of souls in hellish torment . . . oh, wait. Sorry. It's just a standard Monday morning.

Odd noises, strange scents, suspicious looks . . . and it's not burrito day in the cafeteria.

You make a pot of coffee, turn you back for a second, and it's gone!

Craig T. Nelson has to tie a rope around your waist every time you go into the ladies' room.

When you photocopy your ass, the ghostly image of another ass appears next to it.

There's blood everywhere and voices screaming 'Get out!' and you're not a dotcom business.

Graphic: whee30gbz



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Richard Li Tzar-kai

A degree of irony rings loud