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Charlotte Parsons

Today's quiz question: Guess what HKEx's chief executive suggested the stock exchange computer do with its nights off:

A) The Times  cryptic crossword.

B) Hit the Happy Valley race track and make some bets.

C) Swing by a virtual restaurant for a quick byte.

Give yourself a little round of applause if you picked B.

Allow us to explain.

It all started on February 28, when the Hong Kong Exchanges and Clearing sponsored a race at Happy Valley.

It was a pricey affair, costing the HKEx somewhere between HK$200,000 and HK$300,000.

That was the day the Jockey Club's computer system ran into a spot of trouble. The system hit some snags several times.

Savvy Kwong Ki-chi saw his chance to make a few bucks for his business - by suggesting that HKEx's computer moonlight for the track.

'Why don't you consider using our computer system for your horse racing,' Mr Kwong asked.

The races began after the markets closed, so the computer could tackle the job in its spare time.

'Our new system is powerful enough to trade lots of different products, so if you take on any other betting business [such as footy] our system can also back you up.'

So will the Happy Valley gang accept the offer and share some of their oh-so-lucrative business?

Unlikely. When it comes to money-making, they seem to prefer a one-horse race.

Arched pitch: Quote of the Day goes to Wharf (Holdings) chairman and chief executive Gonzaga Li Wei-jen.

He passed along this wisdom: 'Louis Vuitton recently suggested that Canton Road is the 'Champs Elysee' of Kowloon.'

And to think people say Hong Kong lacks culture. Next time you see the Canton Road pedestrian walkway that connects Harbour City to Silvercord Centre, stop to appreciate it. Perhaps take a photo.

After all, it's our Arc de Triomphe.

Texas trailer: We hear US network television is developing a 'Texan version' of Survivor, that popular TV show where everyone gets sunburnt and eats bugs.

Anyway, James Benson informs us that this one will be even more challenging.

Contestants must travel into the deep south, passing through Fort Worth, Houston, San Antonio and some trailer parks.

Each will be driving a Volvo with a bumper sticker that reads: 'I'm for Gore, I'm gay, and I'm here to take your guns.' The first contestant to complete the trip wins.

Weird science: Lai See  has been worrying about the lack of physics in her column.

So we decided to pass along a tale from University of Calgary student James Underwood.

He is the proud owner of a handsomely bound text entitled Analytical Mechanics  6th Ed, Fowles and Cassiday.

This information appears in the appendix:

'Many [mathematical software programs] suffer deficiencies common to most technical user manuals: frequently they are poorly organised.

'Information is sometimes . . . in unsuspected locations.'

Which seems a bit rich, given that young James opened his book's impressive front cover and found himself looking at the last page, upside down.

After some pondering, he rotated the tome 180 degrees at the X-axis. 'Perhaps the manufacturer meant this as a test exercise,' he said.

Graphic: whee27gbz



Exchange jockeys for track work